So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
