Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
