Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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