but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize