are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
operation have a gay friend backfired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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