once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize