Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
