Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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