My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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