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• (707): View more from California

  I haven't been laid since Bush was president.

  Fav 33 780 3102

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.

  Fav 16 1331 5187

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore

  Fav 37 5877 2446

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.

  Fav 15 12535 1406

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  oh my god i'm in a crawl space

  Fav 16 3010 1660

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.

  (406): View more from Montana

  Hospital.

  (509): View more from Washington

  I am invincible.

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (415): View more from California

  i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.

  (1-989): View more from Michigan

  You did this to yourself.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.

  Fav 15 5160 1149

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.

  Fav 7 1216 584

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.

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