did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
