HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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