in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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