woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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