I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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