CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Im part way to drunk.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
