so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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