Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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