I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
