Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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