today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
This show inspires me to have sex in space
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
