TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
These 17 People Made Horrible Decisions That Ruined Their Lives
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.