butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
