I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
