Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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