he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Randomize