youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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