We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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