im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize
