How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize