you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
