she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
