I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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