My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
