Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Randomize
