Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
