ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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