Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
