So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize