is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
