just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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