I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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