my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Im part way to drunk.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
