From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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