Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize