rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize