I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
