is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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