Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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