He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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