So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I just want nice things and good sex
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
