I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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