they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
