Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
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I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize